Resolutions

My 2009;
Last year was definitely a 'learning curve' for me. It was without a doubt the most life changing year of my life, mainly because I left sixth form and got a job. I like to think I'm not your typical 'drop-out', I'm just a girl full of 'potential' thats fed up of being pushed up-hill through education. Sure, in a few year's I'd love to go to university and become an architect but for now I'm going into auto pilot in my low demand retail job, and I am so much happier than I was before. It was definitely a scary move, but the leap of faith worked out. However, this silver lining had a big cloud attached, my social standing. Its easy to have friends when you see them every day at school, and so I've lost contact with an upsetting number of friends.. but it also makes you appreciate the ones who made the effort to stay in my life, and I'm incredibly grateful for those few. As well as those who just fell off my radar, I've lost a few really great friends for a number of reasons, but at the end of the day I cared too much about them and although I don't regret speaking up, if I hadn't they may still be around. The worst thing in the world is seeing someone you care about so much destroy the very things that you loved them for, but I learnt the hard way that the only person that can really help you is yourself. Its a harsh reality.

I spend 2009 away from home a lot, treating myself to experiences that lead me to where I am today. In February I went to Rome with my history class for three days, I was in my element. It's without a doubt one of the most incredible cities in the world for its arichitecture, and we were sure to see it all on the first day. Unfortunately the 3am start and the trek throughout Rome left me bedridden for the rest of the trip with a horrendous flu. I stayed in the Hotel on my own while the rest of class visited the Vatican on the second day and my mum's 'proudest moment' occurred on that day. Lunch time came and so I picked myself up out of bed; starving, sniveling and half-sobbing, got washed, dressed and (thanks to the direction of the charming Italian on the front desk) went to a restaurant down the street. "I just think back and imagine you sat at that expensive restaurant all on your own in your Uggs and an 'I heart Rome' hoodie and my heart just fills with pride, there is nothing my daughter isn't capable of!".

After my exams in July I went to London for a week on my own to work at an architects office. What a week! Living in London is an experience in itself. Everyone you see is on their own mission and a brick wall wouldn't stop them, and as anti-social as it may seem I really enjoyed being a cog in the machine that is the capital of our country and the center of business. As added experience there was a tube strike half way through the week. Note: I highly do NOT recommend being at Piccadilly Circus tube station an hour before the strike begins.. its a hostile place to be. But as far as the work was concerned, I truly found my calling. AHMM really let me help in every aspect of the job, from being given a brief, all the way to construction. I went to meetings, presentations and building sites and I never wanted to leave. As well as shadowing a few of the architects there I was lucky enough to be given my own assignment. Career path chosen.

My favourite part of summer is the festivals and this year me and my best friend went to Wakestock. I look back and think of how happy I was simply sitting on the grass in the sun eating chips and cheese with my wellies and my friends. One of the best things about Wakestock itself is the number of people from Chester that go, so we'd walk around and know half the people we saw.. and those we didn't know we were quickly introduced to. Oh, and the music was sensational! The euphoria I get when I am dancing in the mud to Dizzee Rascal is a feeling that still makes me feel giddy when I remember. I consider music my true passion, so standing in the rain, wind and mud waiting for N*E*R*D to come on was totally worth it. Can you imagine the expression on my face when dad suggested we go to Glastonbury for out family holiday?

Oh and on the subject of music, I went to see Tom Jones in Liverpool. TOM JONES!

Since I finished school I've spent alot of time with my dad, which had been invaluable. Our first bonding trip was one to Bristol for a christian fellowship. I get so overwhelmed and emotional at these kind of things and this was no different, in fact it may have been more emotional. I heard incredible stories of how God had blessed people's lives, things that send shivers down my spine, and I met some great people my age that share my passion for Him (one of which healed a blind guy.. cool enough?!). About 5 years ago I 'compressed my coccyx', its very painful and one of those things that have to heal on their own. Five years later its still giving me grief, sitting on hard chairs or when its cold. One of the big things they were promoting at the fellowship was ministering (healing). For a while I said nothing, it was too emotional to think about so I told them I had nothing that troubled me, but just as we were about to leave I decided I was fed up of having this pain so I asked to be healed. He prayed, I prayed, it got worse! Is this meant to happen? I thought God was meant to make it better? That night when I went back to the hotel I was in agony. What had just been uncomfortable before now hindered my walking, but in the back of my mind I though "it will be better in the morning". Sure enough when I woke up the pain and discomfort was gone and has remained that way ever since and I thank God for that. Oh, and just to top it all off I bumped into Sid from 'skins' at our hotel.. wow. The trip lead on to us having our own fellowship at home, with visitors from all over the British Isles. A common thought that kept coming up over the past year is one of preparation.. something's beginning, we're just not sure what and I am very excited to find out what it is and to be a part of it.

This year also welcomed the return of my aunt and her family from Chile. They moved over for a year so that Uncle Max could lecture physics at Oxford university.. oh very nice! Due to their accessibility we've been visiting them all year, Oxford is a lot easier to visit than Santiago. We saw them every birthday, occasion, holiday and even when I had my flu.. and it was fantastic. Now they're off again and it really makes me sad to think I have no idea when I'll next be able to see my cousins. The value of my family has been reconsidered and appreciated.

Without a doubt when I began writing this I was upset at the though I'd had an awfully difficult year, but when I really think about it I've had so many opportunities and they've brought me to where I am today.

My 2010?